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February 17, 1981
New York, New York
151 1st Avenue #109
New York City, NY 10003
We are all looking for unconditional love. Most of us never received it. When we fall in love we think, "Now, finally, here is someone who will give me the (unconditional) love I've always wanted."
So we marry. Then deeper problems surface---because we're not programmed for love. Instead, we are programmed to duplicate our parents' relationship. Because of this programming, even if we find someone who loves us unconditionally, we would push them away.
How can we attract what we are not programmed to receive? We can't---until we take a conscious look at what we are programmed to attract. Only then can we change our lives.
This program is designed to help us do just that.
Your birth chart interpretation is based on the positions of the planets at the time of your birth. For the benefit of students of astrology, these positions, along with other technical information, are listed below:
Sun 29 Aqu 19 Pluto 24 Lib 12
Moon 18 Leo 47 N. Node 10 Leo 55
Mercury 28 Aqu 03 Asc. 6 Lib 30
Venus 17 Aqu 17 MC 7 Can 31
Mars 8 Pis 47 2nd cusp 3 Sco 03
Jupiter 9 Lib 28 3rd cusp 3 Sag 47
Saturn 8 Lib 59 5th cusp 10 Aqu 58
Uranus 0 Sag 01 6th cusp 11 Pis 01
Neptune 24 Sag 29
Tropical Placidus Standard time observed
GMT: 01:37:00 Time Zone: 5 hours West
Lat. and Long. of birth: 40 N 42 51 74 W 00 23
Aspects and orbs:
Conjunction: 10 Degrees
Opposition : 10 Degrees
Square : 10 Degrees
Trine : 10 Degrees
Sextile : 7 Degrees
She was an extremely beautiful woman in her mid-thirties. She was also an extremely successful business woman---equal to or better than many men in her profession. She'd come to me for a consultation because she was considering remarrying. Although her two previous marriages had been unsuccessful, she longed for a man with whom she could be happy. She was in my office because she honestly wondered if that were possible.
In the course of the consultation, she shared with me that her mother was successful in her career. Message: BE A SUCCESS IN YOUR CAREER. She also shared that her mother had been married several times, so she was programmed for multiple marriages. Each time my client married, her mother encouraged her to leave her husband. Her mother's message was: MARRY, BUT DON'T STAY MARRIED. As a child, my client saw her mother win every argument with each of her husbands. Message: ARGUE WITH MEN AND WIN. My client's father was strong, but distant and unaffectionate. Message: MEN ARE DISTANT AND UNAFFECTIONATE. My client created this situation in her marriages and felt unloved by her husbands. Each of her stepfathers put up a good fight, but ultimately they left. Message: MEN WILL PUT UP A GOOD FIGHT AND THEN LEAVE.
The combination of verbal and non-verbal messages produced a woman who resented men, yet kept turning to them to make her happy. Because she was programmed for marriage to be stormy and her husbands to leave, she created just that. She married strong men and wound up emasculating them. She was looking for love, but her programming would not let her keep it.
Her fiancÚ played right into the program. He was stubborn and determined. He was not a success in his career, although he had great potential. Each time he came close to success, he'd fall short. His ambitions were high, but he became a dilettante. He made a great impression, but had no money. His programming explained it all. At one point in time, his father had been very important and successful in his career. When the young man was just a boy, his father had been nominated for an extremely prestigious award. Winning this award would have meant financial security for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, another nominee was selected as the winner. From that point on, the son was programmed to COME CLOSE, BUT FALL SHORT, and that's exactly what he did in every area of life.
His parents had not gotten along. His proud, stoic father had given him the message that THE WOMAN SHOULD PUT THE MAN FIRST. He also felt that MEN WERE MORE INTELLIGENT THAN WOMEN.
These two were programmed for each other. Here was a chauvinist up against a powerful woman; a business failure up against a business success. Neither one, however, was programmed for a warm, loving relationship, though that's what they both wanted. When faced with a situation like this, the first reaction might be to discourage a marriage, since it seems doomed to failure. Yet, these two people were attracted to each other precisely because they could give one another what each was programmed to receive. And, in spite of their programming, they loved one another. This love could, if they chose, be the impetus to help them see and release their programming and create a warm, loving relationship.
This situation occurs all the time. Our hidden messages are so deeply ingrained in our subconscious that we respond to them unknowingly. For example, if one of your hidden messages is that YOU CANNOT BE HAPPY WHILE A FAMILY MEMBER IS UNHAPPY, you will find that you are never happy because there is always someone who needs your help. Even if you are miles away, just knowing that a relative might be unhappy about something can upset you. After awhile, this message can be triggered simply by the suggestion of happiness--as soon as you feel good you have to feel bad. This totally destroys your enjoyment of life.
Another common message is that YOU WILL NEVER BE AS GOOD AS YOUR FATHER (OR MOTHER, OLDER SISTER, YOUNGER BROTHER, ETC.). If you received this message, you will see to it that you fall short of your goals so as not to surpass him. If he has not been much of a success in his life, where does that leave you?
We have been told that if we will live up to the potential indicated in the natal chart, our lives will work. Why, then, are so many lives not working? The answer is simple: they ARE working, or at least the hidden messages are working, running our lives. By knowing what these messages are, we can be free to be our highest and best, to be limitless.
YOUR FATHER'S MESSAGES
Your father takes you from the security of the home and teaches you how to act in society. He helps you form your public image, the face you want the world to see. The Sun represents your father.
Sun in Aquarius:
Your father taught you to be your own person. He gave you respect for the world as a whole and taught you to treat each person as a friend. He said to put the welfare of the group before your personal needs.
Sun in 5th house:
Your father taught you to be creative, have fun and be a kid. However, HE wants to be the kid, which places you in the role of his parent. If you have a child of your own, your child assumes the role of parent to you, making you feel like the middle child. Your father taught you to be dramatic in whatever you do and possibly to take a chance. He also taught you to be proud of anything you create, especially your children. Your ego can be involved in your creations, though, resulting in pride.
Sun in hard aspect to Mercury:
Your father has a one-track mind, making it hard for him to concentrate on more than one thing at a time. He can only discuss what is of interest to him. You are the same way. He does not give you enough space to be objective about him.
Sun in hard aspect to Mars:
You and your father compete with each other. You are both argumentative and ready for a fight. As a result, your sexual energies are strong. You are each headstrong and want your own way.
Sun in hard aspect to Uranus:
Your father is self-willed, rebellious and unpredictable. So are you. You attract this type of friend. Your need for freedom is so strong that it is hard to stay with one person or situation for long.
Sun in soft aspect to Neptune:
Your father taught you spirituality and selflessness. He is kind and willing to serve. You see only the best in people because you see only the best in him--and he taught you to see only the best in yourself. He is an inspiration to you.
YOUR MOTHER'S MESSAGE
The most important person in your early years is your mother. Because the Moon rules both the mother and the subconscious, her influence reaches you on the deepest levels. It might be said that since the subconscious is the repository of all past-life experiences, your mother triggers this memory, which is why her influence is so strong.
Your mother's main message is to look for emotional security. The house in which the Moon is placed natally indicates that area of life in which you hope to find this security. You received this message either directly or indirectly. She told you where to look for it, and you spend the rest of your life looking for it where she said it would be. The sign in which the Moon falls describes your mother, as do the aspects to the Moon. The aspects also tell you if it will be easy or difficult to find the security you seek. Because the Moon is changeable, the promise of emotional security is elusive. Perhaps this is why you keep returning to the place where it is supposed to be, hoping it will be there this time.
Keep in mind that these messages are not necessarily verbal. You can receive them from her actions as well as her words; by her presence as well as her absence.
Moon in Leo:
Your mother is dramatic, though not necessarily showy. She can say or do things for shock value, though, should the need arise. She is creative, loves to have fun and does well with children. All this applies to you as well. She taught you to be a prince (or princess), but will never relinquish her role as queen. She will dominate either obviously or subtly. Your security needs can be fulfilled through being creative and, perhaps, by being in the limelight.
Moon in 11th house:
Your mother taught you to be a humanitarian, a friend. However, SHE is to be your close friend. She taught you to have unusual friends, to mother them, and to look to them for your emotional security, which can also come from being a friend. Nevertheless, your inner circle can change along with your hopes, wishes and goals. Your true freedom comes from letting go of your emotional attachment to your friends.
Moon in hard aspect to Mercury:
There can be confusion between you and your mother, as you are communicating on two different levels. Your conscious and subconscious minds are at odds with each other, which can produce nervousness, confusion and the inability to clearly express your thoughts. You may find it tiring to talk to your mother, as you have to explain things more than once. This carries over into conversation with others, so that communication in general may be confused and unsettling.
Moon in hard aspect to Venus:
Your mother does not really know how to show love and may give you things (gifts, food, praise) instead of love. This creates the concept of compensation: if you don't feel loved, you'll eat, spend money or indulge yourself in some way. This aspect can manifest as laziness. You can attract self-indulgent, even lazy people to you.
Moon in soft aspect to Neptune:
There is a natural spiritual attunement between you and your mother. She gave you the desire to serve unselfishly. She also gave you a love of music, art and beauty, as well as an appreciation of metaphysics. You both have creative and artistic potential. You feel she is special. You may have a mystical quality about you that attracts people.
Moon in soft aspect to Pluto:
There is a strong, psychic bond between you and your mother. You understand each other's feelings. She gave you positive, healthy messages about sex which now gives you the freedom to enjoy yourself. You are a very magnetic person and channel your emotions well. Your intuitive ability is strong. You are nurturing without being smothering.
Moon in hard aspect to North and South Nodes:
Poor rapport with your mother and women in past lives hinders your relationships with them in this one. The tendency to emotionally hang on to the past can prevent success.
MESSAGES FROM AUTHORITY FIGURES
Saturn is reality and often, restriction. In the natal chart, it can represent your mother, father, grandparents, family ---anyone who imposes a restrictive influence on your life and tries to teach you reality through discipline.
Saturn in Libra:
The authority figures in your life taught you responsibility in relationships. They may have given you the message that relationships involve restriction. This may tend to make you fearful of partnership in general and marriage in particular.
Saturn in 1st house:
The authority figures in your life taught you to assume responsibility early, making you feel older than your years. The message was, "Be a big boy/girl." By assuming your family's responsibility you become serious and build a wall around yourself. You model your behavior after the authority figures in your life, making you distant, authoritative and possibly, unapproachable.
Saturn in soft aspect to Venus:
The authority figures in your life gave you a secure feeling of being loved. As a result, you are loyal in love and able to maintain a long-term relationship. You do not take love lightly. When you love, you willingly assume your responsibility for the relationship. You are not looking for wild, exciting love, but steady, reliable love.
Saturn in hard aspect to Jupiter:
You experience conflict between doing what you want to do and doing what you feel you ought to do. Even when enjoying yourself, you feel limited. This message came to you from the authority figures in your life who would pull you back when you were enjoying yourself. Their concept of God involves fear. This can curb your enthusiasm since the implication is that if you have too much fun, God will punish you---there is a price to pay for all happiness--every silver lining has a cloud.
Saturn in soft aspect to North and South Nodes:
Good rapport with authority figures in past lives makes it easy to get along with them in this one. You will learn the lessons that society has to teach. You can attain power and use it wisely.
Pluto is another indicator of your mother's ---and sometimes your grandmother's---message. Pluto represents total change, control, and transmutation. It is the all-or-nothing planet. Pluto deals with all the mysteries of life: life itself, where it originates, where it goes when it leaves this plane. Pluto and the aspects it makes in your chart describe your mother's message about and your attitude towards sex.
Pluto's house placement indicates where there can be a power play with your mother, where you will both try to dominate and control, and where you can bring about a total transformation. You control because you don't trust. You don't trust the people who rule the house in which Pluto falls.
While Pluto represents your mother's message, it can also represent your grandmother's. Use whichever word applies to you.
Pluto in Libra:
Pluto in 1st house:
Your mother tries to dominate and control your personality and appearance. She wants you to be her. As a result, you are extremely determined to maintain control over yourself. You may not show the emotions you feel in an attempt to maintain self-control. In time, you can totally break free and become your own person.
Pluto in soft aspect to Sun:
Good psychic and emotional bonds between your parents at the time of your birth gives you a positive role model. They taught you to assume command without abusing power. They taught you to get along with those in authority as well as those who follow your lead. You can be a pioneer. You are magnetic and psychic, and get along well with both men and women.
Pluto in soft aspect to Moon:
There is a strong psychic bond between you and your mother. She may have had a similar bond with her mother. You find it easy to understand and get along with women. Your feelings for your home and family are deep and positive. You are a magnetic person with a strong intuition. There is a natural mothering quality about you that does not smother or possess.
Pluto in soft aspect to Mercury:
You and your mother are able to communicate without speaking, the psychic bond between you is so strong. You are this way with others as well. You can spot truth from falsehood and are a natural detective. Your intuition is so much a part of you that you do not see it as unusual.
Pluto in soft aspect to Venus:
You feel deeply loved by your mother and this makes you a loving person in return. Your mother gave you positive messages regarding love and sex, which permit you to enjoy both. You are creative and can enjoy the good things in life without going overboard.
Pluto in soft aspect to Neptune:
There is a positive psychic bond between you and your mother. Your spiritual side is active, and you have vision and insight.
THE FOURTH AND TENTH HOUSES
The fourth house relates to home, family and your deepest emotional security needs. It describes the parent to whom you look for the fulfillment of these needs. Traditional astrology gives the mother rulership over this house because she has been the nurturing parent, the one who stayed home and cared for the family. Today, though, mother often pursues a career, and it is father who provides the emotional security.
The tenth house rules your career, your public image and the authority figure(s) in your life. It is your father who teaches you how to get along in the world outside the home. As such, the tenth house traditionally relates to him.
There are no set rules as to which parent rules which house. Sometimes one parent fulfills both roles. Other times the parents reverse roles. Each chart must be analyzed individually to determine which parent rules the fourth and which rules the tenth.
The relationship between the fourth and tenth is important because your home, family and the security they give you determine how you will do outside the home. If you don't get what you need from one parent, you may turn to the other, who may or may not be able to fulfill your needs. Lack of emotional security in the home can lead to compensation in the career. The career, then, can become a parent replacement.
The signs on the cusps of the fourth and tenth houses add another dimension to understanding your parents. When trying to determine which house is which parent, it is helpful to exaggerate the descriptions enough to allow yourself to be able to make a distinction between the two.
Capricorn on 4th Cusp:
This parent is self-protective and emotionally attached to the family and his/her public image. He/she is moody and takes things personally.
Cancer on 10th Cusp:
This parent is cold, undemonstrative, and concerned with appearances. Money is very important to him/her.
North Node in 4th or 10th house:
While you may be tempted to listen to or follow the South Node parent, the North Node parent is the one who will help you learn your greatest lessons.
South Node in 4th or 10th house:
You have already learned a great deal from this parent in past lives. It is time to turn your attention to the lessons the North Node parent is teaching you. There can be disappointment, even losses involved with the South Node parent if you expect too much of him/her.
THE ROVING DELEGATES
The signs represent principles to be learned. The house cusp on which a sign falls tells us the area of life in which that principle will be learned. Usually, the principle manifests in more than one area of life, since the ruler, or ROVING DELEGATE of that sign, carries the message to another house.
It makes no difference what sign falls on the cusp in question. We simply link the sign with its ruler's house position. For example, with Virgo on the fourth and Mercury in the eleventh, the ruler of the fourth is in the eleventh. The same thing is true if Taurus is on the fourth and Venus is in the eleventh. The same concept applies in each case.
The house in which the fourth or tenth house ruler falls gives us more information regarding that parent's messages.
Ruler of 4th house in 1st:
This parent has a direct influence on you, telling you to be yourself, but influencing you to be like him or her. You may look like this parent. Your emotional security need is fulfilled by being yourself.
Ruler of 10th house in 11th:
The authority figure in your life taught you to be a friend in your career, but at the same time, maintain your authority status. This parent wants to be your friend---and wants to be an important friend to you. He or she can influence your friends and choice of friends.
A FINAL WORD
Now that you've looked at your programming, you may be wondering if it will control you forever or if there is something you can do to change it, to move past it. There is. You can release it and yourself to God in complete faith and trust and just BE. When you come from BEING, you are coming from unconditional love. You see beauty everywhere. You are one with the whole and know that you are protected and loved.